Crazy as a Loom

Monday, February 19, 2018

Relief


Today was a better day.....not totally headache free, but so much better.
I'll take it.
When a little relief comes, it is like a cool breeze on the hottest day you can imagine.
Sometimes, it makes me tear up.
I get defiant about the headache, and hate to shed a tear over it.
But I will shed one for the relief, and that's a fact.



My fave carpenter brought this rack that he made for me.  It's for scarves, and the top piece comes off for transporting to shows.
The dowels are a pants' rack that I bought some time ago.   I would like to buy another pants rack, just like it, to put on the other side of the pole.  Now I just have to find one.




I told you a while back about my "sewing table dreams".........and finally the countertop came in, and fave carpenter put it all together.

Castors wouldn't work, so he put a furniture mover under each cupboard, so I can easily pull it out from the wall, when I want to work on a quilt, and need to get around the whole table.



Can I just say that I LOVE LOVE LOVE it....and it is exactly what I envisioned.

There's space underneath it for my little rolling storage unit, when I'm not using it, and a stool, so I can actually sit and write at the table if I want.

Oh, yeah, I'm in heaven.
Doesn't take much, eh???   A doable headache, and a place to work.



DH calls Naya "my shadow"....she is never far from me.  Seems like she has decided that I'm her person.
That's ok with me.
I'm threading my little loom, and she is napping.
I only have to turn, and she is there.





I recently made a rug for my friend who lives in Georgia.
When she got it, she asked me how much she owed me.
I said, "Nyeh".......she grumbled, then she dropped it.
Probably because the last time she sent me a check, I sent her back a picture of it in little pieces.

So, the sneaky ********* sent me this, because she knew that I lusted after one.




I'm telling ya........doable headache, new sewing table, a Kitchen Aid, and some really good friends.
Oh, and a sweet pup.
What more could I want.




Saturday, February 17, 2018

Today

It is 7am, and I am sitting with my coffee, the sun is pouring in after two days of fog and mist and nothing but white.

I have had two migraines in two days, complete with the aura, a jagged light in my eye.  The first one was  bad enough, but the second one knocked me down even further.   Both days lost to the general fog and malaise and trying to function through the headache.  Then this morning I wake up with another slammer, so I find myself a little anxious and sad.
I won't be making the hour trip to my grandson's first birthday today.    I'll be lucky to get the chickens tended to, and slog back to the couch.

I can read, I will try to keep my mind occupied with that, and maybe crosswords, and maybe a little TV, although that's last on my list.
And I am trying not to awfulize this, trying not to compare it to the first few years after my head injury when headaches like this were the menu for the day, every day.

It's easy to slip into the negative spiral of OH MY GOD, here we go again.  So I am trying very hard not to do that.
Talking to you all.
Putting my fears out there.
Sometimes that helps me to expose them for what they are:  thieves of my time, my hopes, my serenity.

Since that day when my life changed: August 11, 2011, ironically my father's birthday, I have tried to ignore (often) the limitations I experience every day.
I know I am not alone.
People all over the world live through events like this every day, and are grateful to survive them.

But still, it's not easy.  
I remember the doctor telling me that I would lose 30% range of motion of my neck, right and left.
I smile now, thinking of it.
That is the LEAST of it.  O.M.G, the very least of it.
But then, when I stop to really ponder the brain decompression, the cervical fusion, and the subsequent two surgeries to chisel out the extra bone in my head,  I wonder that I am still sitting here, talking about it.
Of course, my life changed.  How could it not???
I think, too, being in my 60's, impacted the whole situation.  Tough to plod through all that when you are older, I'm afraid.

But here I am, I can't say adjusting to the changes, because some things can never be adjusted to.  Accepting the changes, ah, now there's the rub.   Because I have to accept them.
Learning how to make the very most of the time I have left in this world, working AROUND those changes, that's where I am.

I don't have to like it, do I???

We all have a little nostalgia for the "younger" version of ourselves.   I think mine is just a little more pronounced, because that one day in my life catapulted me much further down the road than I expected.

So I shed a few tears, I give in to this headache today, and I hang on to the thought that soon I will feel better, good enough to get up, kick myself in the ass, and get back to it.

Amen and hallelujah.



Monday, February 12, 2018

February


Sometimes I get myself into predicaments.
Well intentioned, but still.

I bought this great shelving unit cheap.  It's on wheels, and has shelves on both sides.  It sat on my back porch for two weeks, while I tried to figure out how to get it into the house.
It would NOT come through the back door.
Too many obstacles.



So I finally bit the bullet.   It had to come through the front door.  I had a contact from craigslist, that was going to do some shoveling for me, so I called him.

He brought his girlfriend, who he assured me was very strong.

Apparently.



Finally.  Inside.

Lois calls it the "white elephant" in the room.

I spent today cleaning and organizing and filling it up.  The shelves on the side towards the wall have those things we seldom use, but have to keep.
And since it's on wheels, it's pretty easy to move out from the wall.

You might notice that I had to remove the bottom shelf on the wall unit, to make room.




My morning coffee view......
I love this old house.
And early morning is my favorite time of day.



This is the 12/2 RS cotton on the loom right now.


Being done with baby wraps, I feel quite free to weave whatever I want.  So I do.


Sometimes, I am not even sure what it will be when it comes off the loom.



But I'm very pleased with this one.



Building stock up is a good way to get through this weather.
Here are three more Möbius shawls.






Naya is a different dog, one month later.
She is totally comfortable, and settled.
It's a beautiful thing.

She has given up sleeping in the dog bed on the floor in my room.  She has taken up residence in my bed, right next to me.  
I love that she is happy, and she trusts me.




I tried some other colors on this bronze warp, but it seems to keep crying for red.
Who am I to argue???




Sunday, February 4, 2018

Brrrr.



For some reason, this winter is getting to me.
It seems like I hurt everywhere with the cold, it goes right through me.
Old bones??
Every night, adding insult to injury, I have to go out and pick up one chicken and take her in.  She is determined to stay out and freeze solid.
I keep telling her that spring is coming.



Sydney  gives Naya a whack now and then, just to be sure everyone knows who is boss.  She has assumed Miss Puss's position.


Everyone has their preferred spots. Poor Jinksie's is still upstairs under a bed.  It will take another month for her to come around.




This girl has certainly eased the pain of losing Roy.  She is the most lovable creature I have ever met.

She has such a sweet soul, I think I want her to be a therapy dog.
Seems selfish, not sharing her lovely self.


She is also a little precocious.......she brought this from the kitchen, apparently, I was a few minutes late in feeding her dinner.



She is also NOSY.  VERY NOSY.
She discovers every possible place that she might investigate, through the cat doors, UNDER the stairs out in her yard.  Everywhere.


L has been busy, weaving up some Möbius shawls.   I weave towels, while she does this.   All the while building up stock for summer shows.





And the loom dog is never far away.



This one drove me fairly wild, because it continually looked like the fell line was crooked.....but of course, it wasn't.
I kept measuring anyway.


Once a week, I make sure to see this one, and her brother.  It makes winter bearable, lightens my heart, makes me smile.
In a world that I often do not understand, she makes sense.

We were painting here, and I put that dot on her nose.  She promptly reciprocated.



Touche'.



Tuesday, January 23, 2018

My shadow.


Today I had a lunch date, and I have to say, it was different.
There were FOUR of us.
A, M, J, and me.
A knew M and J, but not me.
M knew A and me, but not J.
J knew A and me, but not M.
I knew M and J, but not A.

Are you with me???

So, here's where it got weird.  In any one conversation, someone was totally clueless.  Unless we talked about global warming.
I knew better than to talk about politics.

When I said "knew", I mean that there was history.
But there were blanks, between those who did not have history.
O.M.G.

How did I get myself into this???


OK, lunch was good, and we got through it.   But all the way home, I was muttering to myself, "why, why, why?"

I may becoming a hermit.  Well, ok, I didn't have far to go.  But it feels good, what can I say.
In a world where so much does not feel good.

I've been picking out one area a day and organizing......things can get pretty messy in the studio.
And today I cleaned my dye area out on the inside porch.
Finally.

Miss Naya follows me everywhere......I have to be careful not to step back, because she is right there.

Last week our outing was to the vet, not such a great day.
This week we went to the local pet store, which she liked a LOT more.  She stuck her nose in all the bins low enough to reach, and sniffed all the goodies.
Of course, everyone loved her.
We got a Walk Right harness, which is like the Easy Walk harness, but actually easier to put on.
And we got a leash that extends 16 feet, for when we walk on the beach, or in the fields.
Also, a new dog dish, and a naturally shed elk horn, for her to chew, which she has so far ignored.

All in all, a positive experience for her, so that she knows that getting in the car is not the road to hell.


This weekend, I went upstairs to the "rug room", and worked on a rug for my friend in Georgia.



Naya found a comfy place to keep track of me.



On the towel warp, I am still having fun.   Which is really what it is all about.


And I am emptying all those spools with thread on them from previous projects........with the goal of having all EMPTY spools..............I'm getting there.
AND using up all that thread.

This one looks like pine trees in the wind.



Occasionally in the evening, I retreat from the living room, where DH watches TV CONSTANTLY, and do a little night weaving.

Listen to a little Pandora.



I don't stay up real late, because I get up SO early.  Still.

The bed in my room for Naya gets used a lot by SYD.........because Naya would really rather sleep with me.


Surprise, surprise.



Friday, January 19, 2018

MInutia



Hard to believe that Naya has been here 11 days already, the time flies.
It has not been uneventful though.

On Tuesday I took her to my vet, to get acquainted, and to make sure I had all my ducks in a row regarding her heart worm treatment.



The poor girl had been spayed and treated for heart worm in December, then shuffled around to 3 or 4 places.
So my vet fell in love with her, no surprise there.  And he said she needed to start the heart worm prevention now, then once a month.  In 4 months, she needs to be retested to see if the injections in December worked.
So I got the heart worm med, came home, had lunch, and gave her the first dose.

Within a half hour, I noticed her having trouble walking, and that her breathing was labored.  I dug the med insert out of the garbage, to look at precautions and side effects.  Then I called the vet.

So this all resulted in me carrying her to the car, and dashing over country roads, back to the vet, where he determined, as I thought, that she was having an anaphylactic reaction to the med.

They kept her for the day, giving her an IV, and meds to counteract it. I left her there, and felt like a criminal.  All I could imagine was that she was abandoned, again, in her eyes.  This person who promised her safety and love and a home forever, had just dropped her off.  Again.

I was teary on the way home, and it was a long afternoon, before the vet called and said I could come get her.

She had an uncomfortable evening, started new meds, but on Wednesday morning, she was back to her old self.  And I swear, she did not leave my side.  When I went to the grocery store for a quick trip, Lois said she paced.
I hope that when I went back to the vet to pick her up, that she was comforted, that she knew that I wasn't going to leave her.
Who knows what these rescue dogs must think?   I can't really fathom it.
But for the first week, she slept on the couch all night, but for the last two nights, she has slept on a quilt on the floor next to my bed.
Guess it's time for a comfy doggy bed for the bedroom. (DH) brought one home before I finished this post.

How did she weasel into my heart so fast, I wonder?????



I love watching her settle, making this old house her home, making us her peeps.

During the day, she is in the studio with me, and Lois, faithfully.





My 12 year old grand daughter, who will be 13 next month, texted me this picture, and asked me what I thought.




I answered her that I LOVED it.   She said, " I thought you would."
She's ahead of her time, that one.


Here she is, with her new sylish hair cut, reading to Dale.  
Having them visit is the best, best thing ever.
I love them so.


We made home made pita breads, and they were so, so good.



And I have a confession.  I hate the cold, so I cook, and I bake.  It makes me feel better.  Of course, it will also make me HUGE, but that's another story.

Broccoli, cheddar, potato soup.


Cherry Turnovers.


Homemade rolls, and this is the best recipe!!!!


On the studio side of all this, I have been sewing up stuff that was hanging around.

I love this infinity scarf.  Cotton and bamboo.




And to date, we have 100 towels in stock.  My goal is 200 for the year....then we will be set for summer shows.



Here's my next warp, it's going to be FIFTY towels.









Getting ready to thread.



I have been thinking a lot about isolation, and loneliness, and how we do most of it to ourselves.
It's easy though, to be a hermit, when for whatever reason, you don't like winter.  There was a post on FB today, about how loneliness has become a major issue in the UK, especially for older people.

I, for one, have always loved being alone, even as a child.  My mother would often come into my room, peeking around the door, "Are you OK?"
I had my books, my music, my pens and paper.   I was fine.

Even today, I still am fine with it.  I have my looms, my fabric, tons of thread, my sewing machine, all my tools.  I keep myself occupied, and motivated, at all times.  And when my body gets weary, I have books, and pens and paper, and Netflix.  I am fine.
Even with DH with his headphones on seems pretty normal.

I am unbelievably lucky that L and I both feel the same way about this.....so we work together often in silence, listening to NPR, with sporadic conversation, and a comfortable camaraderie.
She doesn't feel the need to entertain me, nor I her.

Loneliness is a state of mind, and sometimes, a choice.  When it begins to feel not ok, the car is right outside, and there are places to go, and people to see.

But for now,  I like to stay home, and stay warm, as much as possible.




Welcome to my world.

Because every thread counts

Because every thread counts